Sabotaging Our Spiritual Growth

Let us look at ways in which the aspirant can sabotage or disrupt their progress to the Threshold of Transformation.


The aspirant may misinterpret what is happening, perhaps because they would rather see things that way or in order to have events conform to their hopes and wishes your highest truth. For example, the aspirant feels and announces that she has “finished” with her parental or other childhood attachments. Unfortunately the inner world is not as defined or explicit as the outer world. When we paint a picture, cook a meal, or go for a walk, we may clearly know when we have completed the task. But the progress and attainments of inner work are subject to our projections, delusions, and fantasies. In misinterpreting, she is avoiding completion, holding on to her parents, and retaining a trace of childhood dependence, rather than truly releasing herself from any attachments. The probes for the therapist are: How are you still holding on? How does dependency reveal itself in your present life, for example, in your current relationship and in attachments to others, or in your fears based on past hurts or childhood dynamics? How do you feel you may be dependent on your therapist and the therapy process itself?


Internal bargaining involves some psychological negotiations or haggling in order to get round some obstacle or get away with something, in the hope that you may avoid the inevitable. While bargaining may serve some purpose in the outer world, in the inner world taking from one part of ourselves to benefit another is counterproductive and negative from the point of view of the psychological state of wholeness. Remembering that the inner state of wholeness is a relatively new condition of life for the aspirant-seeker, some new understanding must arise. The therapist needs to skillfully show the aspirant that “robbing Peter to pay Paul” is no longer an option. We cross the Threshold whole unto ourselves or not at all. Partialness is not an option. The therapist reinforces and helps the aspirant to cultivate and nurture trust, faith, and surrender at this time. The therapist asks the aspirant: Are you aware that you are bargaining? What do you think you can achieve through internal bargaining? In your life up to now you have been innerly conflicted, but the state of wholeness demands your unified self – what changes do you need to take in how you meet life and accommodate this new reality?


The reality of the aspirant’s situation must be faced squarely. Delusion has no place and is sharply damaging and even subversive now. This is a good time for an ultra-honest audit of the inner world. The therapist reinforces and draws attention to the need to follow the authentic heart, the central core of honesty in the aspirant. The therapist’s probes and themes and focuses include: What remains to process? Where are you truly… really? What are your current challenges? What are you avoiding? What are you resisting?


The insecurity of the present condition, teetering on the edge of the transformational threshold causes the aspirant to seek security in some established aspect of life – relationship, work or professional life, creative endeavors, even spiritual practice. Many a aspirant poised on the Threshold “backs up” and takes consolation from some aspect of their past life that suddenly appears compellingly positive, fruitful, and fulfilling. The aspirant announces: I have decided to devote myself to my partner and make my relationship work or I have accepted a new position job in my firm.

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